Writing Your Own Autobiography is Difficult

4 Jun

pen-and-notebook

I am not a professional writer, nor a professional blogger.  Actually I’m not very artistic or good at self expression at all.  But I have always wanted to write a book, at least start off with an autobiography.  I don’t consider my life to be too extravagant but I think I have had enough experiences, good and bad, happy and sad to write about.  Starting this blog is my first step at self expression.  I have always been one to keep everything inside.  I rarely let out my emotions and when I do, unfortunately it’s not very pretty.  I think that by beginning to blog it will help me heal some wounds that I have had, wounds that are still open, still feel fresh.  These are wounds from family, wounds from friends, wounds from men, wounds from myself.   Even as I write this post I find it difficult for a feeling inside me, a pain in my heart perhaps, begins to form and tears slowly form in my eyes.  I have started to write this “book” of mine, chapter 1 is in the works but I found myself needing to stop fairly early.  Writing about my childhood means visiting some of those wounds again and reigniting the pain.  I began to write (or type in this case) and quickly  had to stop, take a deep breath, close my eyes, think for a bit and start again with some renewed strength.  I think it may take me some time to write this book for I have many areas of my life that I have shut off for certain reasons.  Opening them back up is going to take some time and some careful approach but I think that the time is right.  The time is now.  I need to find some sort of way to forgive myself before I can forgive others.  Then and only then I can move on and write about how I have overcome these obstacles and how I have found new happiness in my life with myself and my children.

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2 Responses to “Writing Your Own Autobiography is Difficult”

  1. Luisa June 6, 2013 at 2:18 AM #

    it’s never easy writing about our childhood…we went thru so much crap as kids that I’m happy we survived…take it one step at a time babe, I tried to write a book, stopped in the 2nd paragraph of chapter 1…just take a deep breath, put on your big girl panties and keep on truckin! You have 3 beautiful kiddos that are amazing! Love ya!

    • proudsinglemama June 7, 2013 at 8:19 PM #

      Love ya too. I know I will get through it. I will take it one day at a time. 🙂

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